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Monday, December 1, 2008 1:03 AM
Incomplete
I pray this heart to be unbroken.

I thought I can have a good night's sleep after messaging you but things just doesn't happend to the way I thought.
It started with an alright scene enjoying cup of tea to kiss away the sore throat and flu I'm having.
Half past midnight, everything ended with empty spaces filled me up with holes.
I broke down by the words I read.
But I told myself everything's going to be alright.
& I need a break for my mind to roam around freely and be in anti-problematic mode.
Seriously, one problem comes after another.
Sigh...
My flu deteriorate after I teared for a while up till now and by doing anything that helps, still I don't think it'll help.
I tried putting myself to sleep though but those words still ringing in my head.
& Yeah, maybe you should just leave me alone instead of me leaving you because you know I can't.

I'm awake but my world is half asleep.

Voices tell me that I should carry on (I think I'm losing mine real soon).
So I was thinking I'd put everything aside and put myself first.
Think how would I want my life to be.
Continue being in this state? Or sacrifice something that I have always love irregardless of what befalls it.
That sacrifice is hard for me but it seems like people around me are telling the same thing :/
I don't want to make that move.
Sigh.
Sometimes I just have the feeling it'll happend.
It's either sooner or later.
Guess time will tell.
But I haven't embrace myself. & I don't want to because I don't wish for anything like that to happend.

Distant faces with no place left to go.

If only I didn't bring up that topic things wouldn't have ended up in this state.
& For that I'm sorry.
But you don't have to sound that way.
It just demoralised me somehow.
& I feel that I don't belong into anyone's hands right now.
Sigh.
I'm feeling emptyyyyyyyy.

Random: Cousin Ashburn's blog is damn nice, can?! -.-

P/s: I don't need that session so much, it's just a want for fun not a need.


Love,ABJ
Don't resent me, when you're feeling empty-