Pale

Friday, July 31, 2009 3:26 PM

SuperNova

& I shall remember you for this, boy.

I don't think there's much to blog now but still, I feel that it'll be a long-winded one. Ahaks :)

School was shorttt & sweet. Assembly's back to normal & I heard the cleaners labelled it as "kumpulan baca doa" (Prayer recitals group). Pft, somehow it just doesn't make sense. Somehow they're no different than us young kids, oh well. I'll pass.
I was up at the front at the Quadrangle earlier this morning to receive recognition of you dedicated service. Shooked Mrs K's hands & she murmured something which got me staring at the crowd for like two seconds? It was dumb! But I hope not many notice this 'little gesture'.

My class & 4 Sceptre won a plague but I'm not that sure what catergory. Whenever it comes to such announcements, I tend to heard the less important ones which pisses me off sometimes -.-
Anyway, if the Twins did win the Best Class then it's a kudos from me to you (although I got a heavy grudge on the other twin, I swear). It doesn't matter who contributed more, again I thought to myself my class had enough of how we're being treated so I guess we'll go with the flow and continue spreading truimphant victories like kaya spread on a bread in terms of school competitions/activies & academically. Somehow, someday our miseries will get paid off by something more worthwhile, probably 100% passes for N Levels :)

SS paper was today & it was okay I guess except for a question I screwed up a little bit on Healthcare on Britain. SBQ's smoothly done. At least I'll get the usual standards of scoring high for parts A-C. Then pass question 2a on SBQ. Hopefully, I got the outcome better this time & improve on my SS scores even though it's still going to be a fail. Twenty two points perhaps? Sounds just fine. I am still wondering why I didn't attempt questions on Sri Lanka & Northern Ireland when it's an all year round tested question?
I want to do things in a new way & something new for something that I am really preparing for. Huh?

After school, went back home with Sharifah. Was only eleven in the morning then so I decided to go to the gym. Impromptu idea! I was supposed to called Dian up for gym sessions together. So current progress would be body conditioning! & As body builders, it's not how heavy you carry but how long you endure to carry on playing with the effort & strength you've got. That's the shadow of the day for me to you! :D
Think & take it positive. Nothing is ever competitive when it comes to weight.

Something crossed my mind that I intend to bake apple pies someday when I got the time. Probably before Puasa! & I've been wanting a date out with Muhsin Razali. I don't know when but I want it. You better get this done. Or else...
MUAHAHAHAAHAHAAHAHA, I'm not joking but somewhere among the lines I am :)

Love, ABJ
Love so strongggg.

Thursday, July 30, 2009 7:32 PM

Lifeline

All time new hit for me? Supernova's up next? <3

Oh boy, I'm totally shagged despite having a cold shower. I'm suppose to feel fresh but oh well.

MT Paper was today. I think I will do quite well for Paper 1, as usual :P I wrote an informal letter because I think I can relate things to what had happend recently. Misunderstandings with a friend & write a letter of apology. Based on true life inspiration, I should be getting distinction score for that Section A, if not I guess I am just upsetting myself even more. As for Section B, I wrote a composition about what measures did the school take to slow down the rate of transmitting H1N1 through communal infections. Again, it's based on real life situation & observations. I should be doing well. Other topics seemed so complexed that I needed a story that's so emotional and inspiring? Oh well, I think narrative writing's my type. Maybe I am born to be a journalist in the future. Probably, I'll take Mass Intercomm as one of my choices :P

Paper 2 was not that difficult as I thought it would be but recently, I realised I started to suck at Comprehension when it used to be my strength. Usually, I'd get 21/25 but it seemed I got an average when I attempted Comprehension these days. Gee, & I think I won't do that well for Comprehension in this paper because if requires alot of literature skills like reading in between the lines? Overall, I didn't get really stucked attempting all the questions. Peribahasa was simple I think I could get a four out of five! Other than that, I guess they're okay. But the bad thing was, I did it with care free attitude & I only throughly check through my answers. Bad thing, & I promise I won't do it again. I did so today maybe because firstly, something else was bothering me (topic about what I've written in P1SectA) and secondly, I felt like fainting at any moment of time. Thirdly, I feel like vomitting.

& That was all prolly thanks to the medicines I took. I feel so high & I didn't know what I was doing.

After the paper ended, 962ed to Sembawang Sec Sch with some of the girls. As soon as we entered the school, the malay Lower Sec boys who were sitting on the floor with their class outside the GO were giving comments. & Their teacher was there. The fucking thing was the teacher don't even bother to zip their gaps.

*Translated in English

Kids: Eh, this is the school got make alot of keychains one. HAHAHA~
Girls & I: *Checked our names at the board for oral.*
Kids: They think their school that innocent, wear ties & all.
Me: Excuse me, it's our problem that we dress neatly to impress. & What rights do you have to comment? Look at you people, wearing short pants & giving comments to people taking their National exams?! & Yes, you're talking about a group of people who are older than you. Where's that sense of deal respect? I even wonder, how you guys treat your elderly. & You know what? As soon as I step in this school, nothing feels right 'cause people like you made it all wrong. & I don't even know what your teachers & principal has been teaching & preaching to nurture you as students.
Kids & teacher: *stares*
Me:*walks away & turns back* & Oh ya, *tugging own's collar* this is called badges, not KEYCHAINS :)

I guess oral was okay except that I stumbled upon the word kejuruteraan (engineering).

& I that's my day today. I just feel so loveeee drunk now. S.O.S?

Love, ABJ

Wednesday, July 29, 2009 1:51 PM

Les Miserables

/Edited.

When Pop goes Punk II ( I think ).

My blogger is creating problems so I guess I understand what these bloggers are ranting about. Oh well, I think it should still do fine without the tool bar if you are good with messing those codes ;) I used to irk whenever there's a glitch in Blogger/Friendster/Facebook then I'll go all crazy & started cursing it. Worse comes to worst, I'd stop using it & even delete the freaking account. Like my friendster, but I deleted it due to some personal reasons though. Oh well :)

My heart's currently empty (Do you want to try knocking it? It's hollow!). I got no one to talk to & share my happiness. Or did my happiness just left me a year back when everything turned topsy turvy up till today? Maybe my heart has it's reasons of wanting to rid that happiness. Probably it's not a healthy one, but I'll find a genuine real soon! Be it if I didn't get to share it with the one I love. (But I really do hope so.) Now that alot has happend in just one night, I guess I have to learn to move on & be normal instead of grieving. Everyone must've realise that true love comes & goes like a boomerang. If it's true, it'll come back. I'll wait for it. But it must come back with a prove & reasons as to why, so I won't feel defeated in expectations & hope. I won't be that emotional because I choose to look the other way & God might've want me to see things in a different realm. I see that we're both growing & so I decided to free you since you needed space & freedom. Perhaps along the way, you'd find someone better? You'll never know, friend :)
& I didn't dump you for someone else. If you can't stop thinking that way, I cannot blame you 'cause it's the perception you decided to keep & people like me has no rights to change. Or even the willpower to change (even if I have the rights). I dumped you 'cause nothing is working out. Promises aren't fulfilled. I don't make you happy & I want you to stop being in a pitiable state of distress.

I know I can't move on but I am helping you to move on first before I do. Don't misread my intentions, please?

Today's my last day of MC so I need to spend is fruitfully. Hiking's the plan. I hope I get myself refreshed when I come home later & the will to go on this journey alone. SS Paper is just two days away & I need to chiong on my revision. So far, I had completed Chapter 2 but luckily, the rest of the notes had been long prepared when I was revising for Prelims 1. LOL.
Study at least 2 themes tonight, then I'll be relieved. No DOTA for me tonight I guess? ):

Love, ABJ
Love remains the same.

1:27 AM

Apology Accepted?

I am mournful about what happend earlier. Too many things happend in a day & I cannot take the blow. Thus, for my god forsaken words & actions. It exploded too fast I don't really remember 95% what happend.

After a day filled with wretch, I thought I could have something nicer when night falls with BF but unfortunately, some truths were being found out. Of course, plenty of sorries-&-Take-me-backs but I seriously wasn't in a mood for that. All I ever think off was what he did to me & what I did to him. It's like tit for tat. I guess I have to reconsider. I cannot lie especially about my feelings towards someone, can I? I always fail to lie whenever it comes to feelings. Oh gee. Okay, I still love you :/
I regret what I've done lah, okay. Geeeee ): But I still have yet to get even with you over certain issues with you BF! :@

No doubt, either one of the innocent one was badly inflicted by the misconceptions. So went up & down, highs & lows to fight for the truth & explain. You didn't answer my questions but I did to your questions. Oh well, it's okay as long it's resolved. I thought it's going to take months to get over & done with the wafflings. Glad everything's okay. So now it's time to move on, I guess. But on the contrary, I don't think I can move on for someone (as read on the second paragraph stated). Such an abormal victim he is, anyway. But all was cool. Nonetheless, the fire part was scary yet I don't mind probably because I got full equipment protection & insurance at home. HAHA, try harder :)

All in all, I already am encountering a bad day. I wonder what's in store for me at the later part of the day. Despite eating medicines that may cause drowsiness, I am not feeling sleepy at all but the bodyaches I'm having is indescribable. What's more with my period -.-
God, I just hope things will be better next day. My stomach's currently grumbling. My fever's gone. My flu & cough lessen :D
Yes, I'll be back on Thursday. Somehow I feel lazy for school. It's 1:48am now. Need to find something that cracks my bottle tonight.

& With that, I am done.

P/s: I got a PMS - a real bad one. So I am sorry for downcasting you Muhsin B Razali.

Love, ABJ
I cannot lie!

Tuesday, July 28, 2009 11:37 AM

Rants

Another day to RANT.

As you know I am sick, I was asked to do so many chores & Mum ordered me to do things as if I'm fit as fiddle. Apparently my Bro was sick too but he didn't even contribute anything to ease my burden. I don't feel like it's a shared responsibility at all. You know why?

Previous night, I was asked by Mum to go downstairs & get some food before taking medication. I didn't even finish my DOTA game so I went down. Since there's no sandwhich at 7/11, I just randomly bought an instant fried rice & went home. Upon reaching home, "You went to buy rice? You brother says he feels like vomitting & cannot eat rice.", Mum said. I can't be feeling any more vexed, can I?

In addition, what make me annoyed more was Bro not helping me with any chores. I need to clean the kitchen, do the laundry yet he's shaking his legs in the room using the computer. & When Mum gets back home from work, he quickly switched it off & went to bed. That's when night falls, Mum forced me to get some food for Brother - more likely than me. & Bro's lying like a dead corpse pretending to be 'deadly sick'. Oh God please, I wonder why Mum's always siding him. She even took those medications for him & brought it into the room and asked me to get a cup of warm water. Just go do it yourself can?

I've been patient throughout the days of falling sick. I tried not to curse under my breath because you're my Mum. & You're my Bro. But I guess sometimes, things are just out of control & I cannot stand it. I'm being treated unfairly yet I grieve over it in silence & cry in the toilet? I don't mind invalidating this sense of unfairness but I just need someone to understand which I doubt anyone will/can.

No doubt I can't help but to cry while blogging this entry. & Whenever I touched my hot splotchy face, I always think that I'm being treated like nobody's business. Be it sick or healthy. Happy or sad. Dead or alive. People just don't give a damn ~~sometimes~~most of the times.

If everyone cared.

Mr R just called me saying that I need not come and do my N Level MT Oral and English Prelims Paper. Dreadful things are that I need to retake it at the Centre & English Paper will be taken as mock test but it'll not be recorded in Report Book. However, I'll still get my marks.
Now Mum's going to scream at me & detest why I didn't interrogate Mr R more to let me attend school tomorrow.

I would like to question you Mum if I had the chance, "If you were sick, would you go to work and stuff yourself 9-11 Hours in air-conditioned room doing your job?"

"If no, then why do you want to force me?"

Good thing is, the A1 kid won't be taking Phase 1. Yes Yes Yes! Now we'll see who'll overtake you with 6 A1's & 1 C6. Hahaha~

Love, ABJ
When? Till one goes & leaves you on forever?

Monday, July 27, 2009 2:11 PM

Sick

Hello everyone. I didn't go to school today simply because I cannot get out of bed D;

Okay, I am able to since I can watch TV in the wee hours of the morning.

Slept around midnight & kept waking up every subsequent hour. Took a chance to drink sip by sip of water just in case I might get a sore throat due to heatiness.

At around 0400Hrs, I gave up & decided to sit upright on the bed listening to the radio and moved out of the bed to watched TV outside.

That's when my nose starts to run like a flowing tap. It's not flam that came but it's like normal water? I hate that -.-

So woke up around 0900Hrs & saw Dad coming home from work. Send Bro & I to the clinic. Waited for about an hour for the consultation & burnt sixty six bucks in total. Pft.

& Yeah, almost every clinic was FULL with people wearing mask. Then off to Teh Tarik to get takeaways.

Anyway, there were alot of Malay people staring. Not happy, say lah. I don't even know what I did to offend anyway. Such a community I'm living amongst with. Imbeciled people~

4 Eagles are left with about 33 people attending for school while the remaining were absent due to common sickness. I wonder how other classes are doing. It must've been real bad.

& Most of us got 3 days MC. I got that too but I guess I am returning a day earlier due to examination & N Level MT Oral Examination.

Suey~

I hope I don't have a fever on that day.

My head's currently spinning & I still got to enjoy a round of DOTA earlier. Hehe ^^ Apart from that, I am feeling drowsy from all the medication I took. Guess I'll go to bed right after blogging & study a little bit of SS then do some housechores before I prepare myself for the night once more.

I guess that should be it for now. & I smell conflicts among my fellow buddies. But it's okay, I ain't afraid to write the truths on your faces though I'm being thrown with sarcasms & things which are untrue.

At least, I've done my best to clear the air.

P/s: To those who are ill/falling ill, good luck & huat for upcoming Prelims 2 Phase 1 for N Levelians.

Love, ABJ

Labels: Sick

Sunday, July 26, 2009 8:39 PM

Sick

I got alot of things to RANT today.

1. I fell sick & got the symptoms of H1N1. One by one in my class is down.
(Current people who are sick.)
a. CK.
b. YK.
c. Xiu Ling.
d. Jerene.
e. Larry.
f. Jonathan.
g. Me.
h. Wonder who's the unlucky one.

& To all these people, do get well soon & huat for Prelims 2 okay!

(Symptoms I have.)
a. Light head.
b. Itchy lungs & countless coughs.
c. Inconsistent temperature (>37.0)
d. Sneeze countless times.
e. Cold sweat.
f. Achy body.
g. Somehow at certain point of time my lungs feel painful.

2. I am so annoyed with Brother & Ilham. Ilham got free tickets from the club he's playing for the L'pool vs Singapore.
a. Ilham's a Chelsea fan. (Traitor!)
b. Brother's never interested in soccer (Benchfoot!)
c. *screams out the window.*

3. Despite falling sick, no one in the family knows.
a. Made me go downstairs to withdraw cash, buy food for them.
b. Made me clean the kitchen.
c. Need my unneccessary help when it can be done on their own.

4. Some people are pissing me off.
a. Was it just me? (Because I am sick, so negative thoughts went wild & crazy.)
b. I don't want to go clinic because I just burn 40 bucks for medications last week. (& I haven't finish my Antibiotics course.)

5. I don't want to go school in this condition.
a. Firstly, I might be sent home first thing in the morning during first TE.
b. Mum will comment me of being lazy to go to school (Like hello, I love school more than home.)
c. Prelims 2 Phase 1 is 03 days away.
d. More people will get infected.

6. I am tired.
a. But I cannot go to sleep.
- Mum calls for no reason.
- Restless & guilty that I didn't study today.
b. I tried going to bed for the third time in the day earlier, but to no success in doing so.
c. I think I'm insomniac.
d. I think I think too much.
e. I think I am depressed.
f. I need someone to couch me in in their lives so I'll feel secured.

That's all for today. Sickening Sunday. Haish.

Love, ABJ
Please, no more troubles between you & I 'cause I'm not choosing the 'game over' side.

Labels: S.O.S

Saturday, July 25, 2009 2:55 PM

Always

Pure coincidence :)

"IF YOU STAY, THEN I WON'T GO. IF YOU GO, I'LL BE THERE ALWAYS."

Hello everyone!

I am currently feeling so weak & my muscles are aching :P

I was left with no choice but to go Ngaji. It's a good thing to go religious classes but somehow it's dreadful :/ People would know what I mean if they attend Madrasah, religious classes or volunteering the mosque. (I think volunteering is fun & helpful + Doing a good deed, though)

Reached home around 1pm & did the laundry. Watched Prison Break and dozed off on the couch but I woke up soon after and started to switch the computer on. Currently blogging & having stomach ache plus a little bit of giddiness. Probably because I haven't eat.

Sam Raimi's turning fanstasy to reality!

He'll be making a fantasy film of Warcraft. Oh boy, I cannot wait. & I'm sure CGI's & sounds effects would be awesommmme. Someday, he should collaborate his fantasy-like inspirations with Micheal Bay. Then it'll be terrific :)

Out of the blue, I am wondering why some blogs cannot upload pictures or put colours for their fonts. So far, nothing has happend to my blog yet & I'm happily blogging as per normal. Weewoo? :P

Just be patient, people. 'Cause it's a virtue. & It's normal. At least it's not so bad like Friendster! -.- So look on the greener side of the grass & continue blogging! Doesn't mean it stops there & let it die. It's your life story, make it come to life & share em'.

I don't plan to go out anywhere today since I did yesterday so I guess I'll be revising my SS Prelims 2, Phase 1.

Mr R's nice enough to let us know what topic is coming out for SBQ & SEQ seperately. Globalisation is not tested. Oh my, I thank God. But on the other hand, it's a middle-finger situation because I already revised it some few days back. Pft.

Effort wasted, but nonetheless for N Level's sake. I forgive you. Hahaha :P
Second topic I'll be worrying about would be Geography & probably my Combined Science. But I believe, I'll complete my revision according to agendas scheduled ; provided if I don't procrastinate :)

& That's the end of my post now. I think I'm getting a gastric pain. I want to eat but I feel like puking it all out. Urgh.

Love, ABJ

Where are you?

Labels: Always